Packing…

At some stage you would think I could have mastered the art of packing. Unfortunately I will give you the tip, I haven’t. Less than 1 day before I take off and I have started on the mountain of washing. On the plus side due to being ruthless with my clothing recently I don’t really have that many clothes. The downside, I’m always washing and I really don’t have much to wear on holidays.

I’m trying to see if I can pack a ball gown, and trash it one last time. Downside…its going to have to travel dirty as I don’t have time to wash and dry that tonight and it takes up so much space. I’ve got to get in 3 pairs of shoes, this is annoying to say the least. Weight restrictions are going to be my killer… again!!!

Oh well at least I’m procrastinating well, that is a skill that has taken years to hone and perfect, a very fine line between complete laziness and procrastination.

Now I must remind myself that the gift with purchase for packing is…. I get to go shopping! Perfume, alcohol, fabric, electronics ūüôā My new motto is… With everything there is a reward. It doesn’t always involve money, it won’t always involve travel, maybe its as simple as spending some time reading a book, but there is going to be a reward.

So a quick surf around town to catch up on the goss. Some princess is having a baby, better see if my friend is going to be needing ‘Scotty’ to beam her up, so as she so eloquently put it… rip that baby out myself as she wants to share a birthday with one of the potential heirs (is that even the right word?) to the throne. Poms! Eh… and now they steal the start of the Tour de France next year.. boo.

Focus!!

I am the queen of procrastination under the guise of multitasking. Right now this is my last full day before I commence what I am now learning to know is….. my ‘mid life crisis in a red swag’.

Yes, I am flying to South Korea. I am going camping. The Cure will soothe my soul and take me back to years gone by. Stereophonics will just make me sit back and enjoy. Then Fun. will get me up and dancing. All over three glorious days where the temperature resembles something that is reasonable, and I will accept humidity and precipitation as a by product of being warm and getting a sun tan.

I will shop at the fabric market and get lost for hours in its maze. Maybe even go and have a cup of coffee with some friendly kitty cats. Who know’s but I am certainly going to relax and escape.

Escape from the paperwork that I need to complete, the music I need to face, the planning and working. Its just all stuff I try to avoid at the best of times, but guess its reality time. ¬†But until reality time is a reality, I’m going to live my midlife crisis, with my head held high. This one is about me! Its really about me, I’m happy to share some of it with other people, but its on my terms.

Quitting Smoking

It’s nothing new, but really do I have to. Sitting here for the first time with no cigarette at the computer. Watching the clock tick down, to when the little cafe opens so I can buy a packet.

Ran Out of Cigarettes #1 – Estimate time lasted before a cigarette… approximately 5 hours and that included sleeping.

Really should go back to patches but the lovely vivid dreaming really isn’t for me right now.

After 20 years of being a smoker (wow times flies when you are having fun) its really hard to bid them farewell, because I honestly enjoy smoking. One place more than most will be at my computer…its been a long part of my established working life.

In order to delay the time since I ran out of cigarettes…. having a coffee.. they say sip water but it is too cold this morning. But I did add a dash of rum choc liqueur … that will delay driving even longer. Maybe I will make it to 6 hours.

Another day another dollar…

Or so the saying goes, not like I particularly care about the dollar or trudging my way through another day at the grindstone. This working thing really isn’t all its cracked up to be, I have a list of things that I should be doing but instead I have found myself surfing the net, playing on my phone or singing along to the radio in my head, and now I am blogging. With just over 4 weeks before I finish this job, as much as I am not a country type girl the thought of not having to get dressed for work and come to an office and be bored all day is sounding mighty appealing.

What isn’t appealing is as the weather warms up again, I move further away from the beautiful blue ocean. A long hot summer at the beach is really what I want to be doing, but alas it isn’t looking possible yet. Once the harvest is finished the question is should I be heading back to the coast to enjoy the last few months of summer or should I stay closer to my husband? I know at the farm I have my husband, a swimming pool (note this is a poor subsitute for the beach) and my beloved furbabies, but its isolated. ** sigh ** more decisions to be made but I am not making them right now. At least my current employer is advertising my position as a casual one so there is a chance I can get it back if I decided to move back.

Also, at the rate I am going, if I don’t pull my finger out I will be still be studying next year. Who could have imagined that one unit could be doing my head it soooooooo badly. I think that because it is a group one that makes it just a little bit harder, the guilt of not giving 100% isn’t worth it. Lucky at least my group is happy to pass, we are all over this study game, passing is all I need. Oh note to self… register for the degree… you finish in like 6 weeks!!!

Well suppose I should try to look like I am achieiving something constructutive right now, considering I have just under 45 minutes before I finish for the day, and at the rate I am going, if I don’t keep busy I will fall asleep at my desk. It was naughty of me to deliberately set myself up in the corner so I could surf the net in peace and quiet, before we go onto the real network which will be monitored.

Tonight is shopping night, so I need to conserve my energy to find a dress for a friend’s wedding in a few weeks, not that I want to buy a new dress, but the ones I currently own are considered a little too low cut for this wedding, shame really, its good to torment my ex, with a revealing outfit.

When you are wrong…

When you are wrong it is always important to admit it, the “we have to talk” I spoke about yesterday was all in my head. Now this is an absolute first but I must say it reminds us that our gut feelings can be wrong. But there is something still isn’t quite right. So maybe my gut feeling is predicting something, but only time will tell.

I also thought after all the late nights and hard work that I would fall into bed and sleep until at least 10am. WRONG!!! Why is it when you can curl up for hours on end and get some decent sleep your brain feels the need to wake you up nice and early. For me right now my sleep debt is so far in the red that no amount of extra sleep will restore it to neutral again. Whilst I have slept I feel just as bad as I have all week.

Exhaustion is a funny thing, it means you don’t even want to do things that you need to do or want to do. This week is going to be hectic and as per usual I am leaving things. Like today, I should have been out shopping for some gifts but alas I have decided that curling up in bed with a DVD at 11am is a better use of my time. Maybe I will fall back to sleep and wake up refreshed, who knows.

Speaking of DVD’s I am about to continue my journey through Ally McBeal… those wishing to judge, the big red x on the top right hand side of this window is a great place to start. I watched this for the first time in my early 20’s and now revisiting the series in¬†chronological¬†order. ¬†I should add for those that are a little emotionally bruised it really isn’t the best viewing entertainment, remind you of how bruised you really are.

But I sometimes like to torture myself and today is no different. So whilst the sun is shining, and the weather is just divine, I will put my fan on (so I stay cool), find some blankets to wrap myself up in (so I feel safe), grab the tissues just in case and see if I can find a way to smile again. Then spend my evening being a¬†conscientious¬†student.. final subject for my degree and I am going to make sure I get there, on time and with little stress, which means … working regularly at it!

The peace and tranquility of Saturday

It is weird but for me I like a peaceful Saturday morning … whilst Sunday is “the day of rest” for me Saturday mornings are just important. After a long week at work I like to sit quietly on a Saturday and just potter around the house. Today is my first real Saturday just pottering and it feels bliss.

My flat mate is still asleep and I have been floating around for the last hour and a half. Spoke to my husband who arrives in the city for about 3 days tomorrow. (Note to self: buy beer). Went and bought the paper and started the dishwasher. The rest of the morning will be spent just pottering and might even throw on a load of washing or two to get the sheets done.

This afternoon will be a bit more eventful with a trip to the stores to buy some makeup for work. The not wearing of makeup (which I am a fan of) is not looked on particularly fondly in a corporate work environment, the cult I have rejoined after many years. But if the ATO will not allow makeup as a tax deduction .. how rude … it is generally only purchased for work and the very¬†occasional¬†night out.

Whilst I am in the city it will be good for myself and my husband to go out more and socialise. This weekend he wanted me to play in a lawn bowls twilight event, it is actually good fun and last year I think we won or nearly won it. But I just wanted one more weekend to get organised and not have to face the 240km trip each way. It is hard because it is just so far and Saturdays are so enjoyable and I really don’t think I could do it on a Friday night after working all week. So hopefully over the next year I can put together some nice going out ideas that don’t cost the earth because the budget is stretched really tight now.

Hello … beach house

Well I am officially into my new house. Standing here all alone (yes standing as no chairs or table as yet) I wish I could just afford to rent the whole house myself. For the first time in nearly 7 years I will share a house with someone who isn’t my husband and the last year I lived primarily alone for work reasons.

Also right now I am missing my bed. It will have been 5 nights that I slept on an air mattress and also worked 4 days. It really isn’t nice not having “my” things around me and being comfortable. ¬†On the plus side my room has the most amazing wardrobe… I went to BigW and did a spot of shopping for some things for it.

Half way through I have walked out to sit on my front lawn and watch the traffic at the lights. I can’t remember the last time that I just sat and chilled out for 5 mins watching the world go by. During 2011 I must remember to take some time out to just chill even if for 5 minutes.

So instead of writing my essay I am organising my new wardrobe. Standing up right now is hurting my feet which isn’t surprising considering I have no where to sit down except for the floor. The rest of my furniture (including my bed) arrive¬†tomorrow. My world consists of a laptop and internet (yes, I like to get my priorities right), an air mattress, clothes and the car.

Better get back to organising my wardrobe… because if I am not going to write the essay that is due on Monday at 9am I might as well do something constructive.

Its hot … it rains … my motivation …

The weather is just awful right now, I know that over the last few years with¬†air-conditioning¬†but really how do we survive when the humidity gets above 90%?¬†Today it has rained during the day and it felt worse… interesting it is raining now and without the sun it does feel a bit cooler, but still feel like my world resembles a sauna.

It was impossible to even put makeup on this morning which meant I drove to the car park.. got the car freezing cold and then applied makeup. By the time I got to work half of it had fallen off my face … and of course that look of makeup “shine”.

Don’t know why this bothers me as normally turning up to work without makeup on isn’t a problem but one must consider that at this stage in my city employment, one must keep up appearances. So makeup is here to stay, but in this weather I refuse to wear stockings.. corporate or no corporate that is pushing the friendship too far.

On a plus side for work.. I parked in the car park close to work rather than half a mile away. On the downside my shoes aren’t ready for at least another 2 weeks and today’s attempt at shoes just gave me a blister. My treat for all this working is one decent pair of work shoes. For anyone in WA I highly recommend Benelli Shoes. ¬†In only a few short weeks my feet will have shoes custom made for my tootsies.

Well yet again it is late at night and I have achieved nothing study wise … looks like a weekend surrounded by boxes and a laptop are in order… shame really but right now with this heat and living on an air mattress (not recommended) I can’t be bothered.

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